Apple-boy In a response to the hacking of a number of celebrity phones and backup data, Apple will reportedly add a new security service to the iPhone 6 and add features to IOS 8 to help prevent future compromises of celebrity data. One of the fixes will be to assign an Apple fanboy to attractive celebrities who will turn off photostream for them and enable 2 factor authentication. The fanboy will change their “monkey” based password to something not in a dictionary and incorporate special characters to increase entropy. Changes to IOS 8 will include not allowing real answers to security questions and a new app called iNude. The iNude app will analyze photo’s taken and send notifications when skin percentages exceeds 50%. The notifications will say” “Do you really want to put this on the internet?”, “What would your mother think if she saw this?”, “This is really not your best look, wait till you’re sober and look again.”, or “Go ahead, you’re career is tanking anyway.” Industry insiders say these changes will make Apple devices the most secure in the world and anyone who doubts that is a hater and a douche-bag anyway.